Does that make you sick? Me too, but according to the Boston Globe, they already won the Super Bowl, and even are now taking pre-orders for ”19-0: The Historic Championship Season of New Englands’ Unbeatable Patriots“ on Amazon.com. That’s right, they have alreadly written a book about them.
The Globe of course already knows the outcome as I am sure they have paid off the refs to insure a victory so a piece of their wonderful historic run will forever be preserved in their book. Ahhhh, the Boston Globe. What a totally wonderful and objective news agency. Of course it makes sense, they probably have already talked to the Commissioner, Roger Goodell, and he has assured them that reason for the immenent victory was that he promised the Patriots a Super Bowl victory if they would shut up in regards to the fines levied for the “cheating” escapade. In reality though, it is probably nothing more than an attempt to beat the Boston Herald in classlessness.
Yes, the Herald is no better than the Globe…at least the Globe is not making it personal, like their Bostonian sister. Earlier this week, staff writer Jessica Heslam, we will just call her Skank for short, wrote a lovely piece on why Bostononians are so much better than the people of New York…in fact, the rest of the world as well. You can read the “Skanks” drivel here.
I don’t usually take to calling people names, especially those who are so much classier than myself and live far better lives than those who call themselves New Yorkers, but if she can call New Yorkers classless riff-raff, I can call her a Skank. I can think of far worse, but Skank will do.
So it looks like the Patriots have it all wrapped up, they have won the Super Bowl, but there is good news and bad news. The good news is that you can make an even bet that they win, because you won’t lose, unfortunately the bad news is no one has said they will cover the line…so you can’t take them and the spread. Knowing that the Globe knows something we all don’t…I would have to assume that the Commish will keep it close.
As for the Herald? Well, let’s just say it is probably the first article that she has written for an actual newspaper, it’s a far cry from the Las Vegas call girl pamphelets she has been writing up until this week.