Dolphins Draft Day 2017: 5 Ridiculously Bold Predictions

As Draft Day finally arrives, the Miami Dolphins mull what to do and who to take. Here are 5 incredibly crazy theories about what might transpire on Draft night.

The draft is officially upon us. Opinionated fans rejoice in the carousel and insanity of the NFL’s annual version of Red Rover. Nothing is certain, save for trades, poaching, free falls of once sure bets, and the guarantee that a surefire superstar will surely disappoint while an unknown prodigy could be dug up out of a later round.

There are a lot of mock drafts going around. Each person is sure they know what each team is thinking, making for the most fun guesswork since March Madness. Diehard fans will cheer the big names being taken off the board and most assuredly voice their disdain when their team doesn’t draft the player they know will be a future pro bowler.

With all the serious articles and player analysis ratings being presented, Dolphins faithful deserve to have a little fun. Therefore, here are five ridiculously bold predictions that will almost certainly not happen; or, that might occur, making this writer look like a genius in hindsight.

#1. The Dolphins trade up with Carolina to the number 8 slot to select LSU running back Leonard Fournette.

This is a fun one to think about. The Dolphins have no need for a running back after the shocking success of Jay Ajayi last year. However, neither did the Tennessee Titans a year ago, when they paired up Heisman trophy winner Derrick Henry with recently signed bell cow DeMarco Murray. Running backs and injuries go hand in hand, so it wouldn’t be too shocking to dream up a pairing of Ajayi with Fournette and watch them run roughshod over defenses. Half the fans would absolutely love this move, while the other half would cry foul that Miami took a player at a position they didn’t need.

In this unlikely scenario, Fournette surprisingly falls past the fifth pick, and the coaches think, “Well, why not?” Miami then leads the league in rushing in 2017 and cruises to a Super Bowl LII victory. This causes Patriots coach Bill Belichick to deem the quarterback position unnecessary, and builds a team composed completely out of pass-catching running backs for the following season.

#2. Miami trades away their next two drafts to the Cleveland Browns, shooting up to the number one spot and taking North Carolina quarterback Mitch Trubisky.

What if Dolphins head coach Adam Gase secretly built a Mike Ditka/Ricky Williams level of affection for the Tar Heels signal caller, prompting one of the craziest draft moves in Miami history? Absolutely insane, you say? Of course it is, and that’s the whole point here. If you think Ryan Tannehill should be sitting at home comfortably expecting to be the starter next year, just ask Sam Bradford about the 2016 draft and Carson Wentz.

In this crazy timeline, the Dolphins Gase believes that Tannehill is not the quarterback of the future, and decides to shake up the draft and bet all his horses on Trubisky. Cleveland happily accepts more draft picks, using a good chunk of them to then trade back up and get Deshaun Watson, the national champion gun-slinger from Clemson. Miami later gets a first round pick back in 2018 by dealing Ryan Tannehill to Houston, where he reunites with Lamar Miller and continues to get hit a lot. In a surprise twist, Miami finishes with only 6 wins under a rookie quarterback while Tannehill rides Miller and the Texans defense to a Super Bowl upset of Seattle. Dolphins fans lament the trade and say they knew all along that Tannehill was an elite passer, and never doubted him in the first place.

#3. The Dolphins stay put, drafting Alabama linebacker Reuben Foster with the 22nd overall selection.

This one is not that shocking, actually. With Foster’s recent draft stock taking a tumble in light of reports he had a diluted drug sample at the NFL combine, coupled with the altercation he allegedly had with medical personnel, it wouldn’t be surprising if Foster falls all the way to Miami at 22. The question is, would the Dolphins take him? Miami is no stranger to taking chances, as evidenced by last years pick of Laremy Tunsil. Tunsil was unanimous for most mock drafts last year as the possible number one pick before the newly relocated Los Angeles Rams traded up to nab California native Jared Goff. A video of Tunsil smoking weed in a gas mask tumbled his stock all the way to the Fins at number 13.

The Dolphins are in need of a linebacker as much as Phil Simms needs a new agent. If Foster is there, in this scenario, Miami decides the talent outweighs the drama and eagerly jumps on one of the drafts best linebackers. Newly signed Lawrence Timmons molds Foster into the second coming of Ray Lewis, sans limo. Foster becomes one of the leagues most dominant pass rushers and prompts fans to come up with the clever nickname “Foster care”. Or something like that.

#4. The Miami Dolphins trade their first round pick and a conditional 2018 third round selection to the New Orleans Saints for Drew Brees.

This is the one that I’m the most proud of. In this never-gonna-happen-but-fun-to-think-about draft scenario, Tony Romo decides he doesn’t want to rest on his laurels and gives one last college try to hoist the Lombardi trophy. He signs with New Orleans hours before the draft, hoping to play with Adrian Peterson and learn from head coach Sean Payton. Brees in turn gets dealt to Miami, years after the Dolphins blew a huge opportunity by instead taking Daunte Culpepper in free agency.

Here, Brees starts the season and leads the Dolphins to the best record in the AFC and a Super Bowl birth. He throws for over 5,500 yards 51 touchdown passes. Jarvis Landry, Kenny Stills, DeVante Parker and Julius Thomas all have over 1,000 yards receiving. Ryan Tannehill then reads this article and calls me up, asking why two out of the five scenarios have him being replaced. I assure Mr. Tannehill I’m a big fan and deflect blame to my editor for putting pressure on me to write something different. All is well.

#5. Do it all playmaker Christian McCaffrey falls out of the top 15, and Miami trades up with Tennessee to draft him at number 18.

I figured I’d throw one real possibility in list, as this one seems fairly reasonable. Obviously the Dolphins don’t need offensive talent. It would make more sense for the owners and coaching staff to go defense in the first round, if not the first two or three as well. However, McCaffrey is a do-everything type of player. He can catch passes, run the ball, and return kicks on special teams. Although Miami really likes second year player Kenyan Drake, there are still questions remaining about Damien Williams place with the team, and the rumor mill has been swimming recently that Miami has taken a shine to the Stanford standout McCaffrey. Will they take him? Probably not, but stranger things have happened.

There you have it. My spicy, bolder than bold predictions of what might but probably won’t go down in the 2017 NFL Draft with the Miami Dolphins. The truth of the matter is that there will be some jaws that will drop come Thursday night, as teams wheel and deal and begin to undercut each other. No matter what happens, just remember-they do this for a living, and you don’t. So give the teams a little slack.

Or remind them that at one point in time the Dolphins decided not to go after Aaron Rodgers and passed on Randy Moss. That works too.