It might be smart for the Miami Dolphins to not cut any wide receivers

I’ve been rolling around this Miami Dolphins wide receiver conundrum for a few days now and didn’t know how to exactly present it to the masses. But now, I think I know how to explicitly say this; I really do think that it would be wise for the Miami Dolphins to not cut any of their prized wide receivers.

Currently, the Dolphins wide receiver room is one that’s littered with all types of skills. That room has speed, height, size, playmaking ability, shiftiness, and a swag that you just can’t teach. Want to know what that room lacks? More than six healthy hamstrings. That’s not hyperbole. Out of the eight or so receivers that I’m truly talking about there are about six or so healthy hamstrings out of the bunch. Quick math here, but that’s not enough hamstrings.

The latest was immediately after Preston Williams returned to action, with an undisclosed injury, probably a hamstring because why not, this happened.

This is where my strategy of the Dolphins not cutting any of the wide-receivers started percolating in my brain. Why not just keep everyone because you know that there isn’t a universe that exists even in the MCU where all of these guys stay healthy.

If I was booking the receiving room as if I was the late great Dusty Rhodes I would have Parker, Fuller, Waddle, Bowden, Wilson, and Hollins on my 53 man roster. I would then have P. Williams and Grant on the practice squad. You can sub out any combination of Bowden, P. Williams, and Grant as you want. Of course, if I’m encompassing the “American Dream”, I’ll have to have a Dusty Finish where I find a technicality where I can have all the receivers eligible to dress for every game.

Some of the latest talks on the Dolphin’s weak hamstringed receiver room are a bit more optimistic. As per Barry Jackson of the Miami Herald;

"The Dolphins are privately optimistic that first-team receivers DeVante Parker and Will Fuller will be healthy enough for the start of the regular season, though Fuller would not be available until Week 2 because of a 2020 NFL suspension."

Perhaps the Dolphins are playing coy about the true health of Parker and Fuller. If so that’s a dangerous game considering that Fuller has had exactly one practice with Tua. Not ideal.

I’d also like to know why all the Dolphin’s wide-receivers have hamstrings made out of string cheese. Is it some sort of prerequisite that they have to hamstrings with the strength of a baby or did they all hurt their hamstrings as George Costanza did in Korea?

I know it’s a bit of a radical idea for the Dolphin’s wide receiver room to not suffer and real cuts, but Stone Cold Brian Flores does things his way. And right when you think he’s going to zig he zags so hard that the Earth shakes. If anybody had it in them to keep this many receivers for the sole reason to replace guys he knows are going to get hurt, it’s Stone Cold Brian Flores. I even think that kind of foresight would make him feel all kinds of tingly. I know I feel good thinking about it.