Prediction: The Miami Dolphins will be 7-7 by Christmas
By Tj Ray
I’m tempted to hedge my bet here, but this is a no-hedge zone. No, this is a BOLD prediction, so let’s be bold. After a terrible start to the season, the Miami Dolphins will be 7-7 by Christmas morning. Coming off of an unexpected win against the Baltimore Ravens on Thursday night, the Dolphins are sitting at 3-7 around the midpoint (sidebar: the worst consequence of a 17 game season is that there isn’t a true midpoint of the season anymore) of the season.
So is it absolutely ridiculous to think that this team could pull off a 5-0 stretch after going 2-7? Probably, but we’re going there anyway. The defense balled out against the Ravens. This year’s rookie class is looking pretty amazing. Jaylen Waddle is on pace to break the rookie receptions record on a terrible offense. Jaelan Phillips is ranked second among rookie edge rushers even though he hasn’t even seen the field that much. Jevon Holland should be in the DROY discussion with how well he is playing.
Tua Tagovailoa is starting this week against the Jets who are a mess. Even more of a mess than the usual Jets mess. Whether it’s Mike “First Overall Pick” White who threw four interceptions this week or Zach Wilson coming off an injury, the defense has a real shot at building some more momentum this week.
In Week 14 the Dolphins have the Panthers and Cam Newton, who two weeks ago was sitting on the couch watching football and is now presumed to be their starter. I’m not sure why the general consensus among the talking heads seems to be that Cam is going to be 2015 MVP Cam, but I don’t see him just slotting into this Panthers offense as the starter without any issues. This one isn’t an easy matchup, but it’s definitely a winnable matchup.
Next up is Danny Dimes and the New York Football Giants who currently sit at the bottom of their division at 3-6. They’ve been decimated by injuries and bad quarterback play all season. Another very winnable game. And then on December 19th, the Phins have the Jets again. Those divisional matchups are always a bit of a tossup and you can usually throw the records out, but in the spirit of positivity, that’s another very winnable game for Miami.
So if the Dolphins can win all four of those very winnable matchups, they’d be sitting at 7-7 on Christmas morning and a “lost” season would feel not quite as depressing. Will it happen? Who knows. Will you come back and comment on this article when they end up losing all four of those matchups? Almost definitely. Will I achieve my lifelong dream of being called out by Freezing Cold Takes? Probably not, because we’re being BOLD today and riding this train all the way to .500 by Christmas!
What a sad state of affairs when getting to .500 seems unrealistically bold.