The Peyton Manning saga has played out and now is finally coming to an end. Today, it’s being reported that Manning, barring any snags, will sign with the Denver Broncos. Spurning in the process the Tennessee Senate (I wouldn’t drive in Tennessee if I were you Peyton) and the Jim Harbaugh led 49′ers. Maybe Jim shouldn’t have flown out to court Manning while he was still proposing to Alex Smith.
The Miami Dolphins have of course been out of this for awhile, o.k. they were never really in it. When you beg your former starter or 13 years ago to beg for a sit down, well…here’s your sign. In that time since Jeff Ireland and Stephen Ross realized that Manning wasn’t going to sleep with them, they courted Matt Flynn but really it was only a courtesy date between Joe Philbin and Aaron Rodgers’ little sister. I mean sometimes when the ex’s little sis grows up you want to take a look right?
The Dolphins didn’t really want to take Flynn to the expensive steak house so they took him to the Huddle House instead and he decided he was better served by going to the Seattle fish market. The Phins have since taken an interest in Alex Smith but today’s events likely mean that Harbaugh and company will do some major butt-kissing ala Stephen Ross and Jeff Ireland to Tony Sparano and Smith, who wants to return to the 49′ers will sign later this week.
That leaves Miami looking at the draft where the two top prom queen vote getters already have dates, so the Phins will go with one of the queen’s courts in either Ryan Tannehill or Brandon Weeden. The Dolphins of course have been jilted over the last weeks free agent market and will have to pay for more than just a limo to make either one of them happy. The number 8 overall pick may not be enough to get Tannehill so the team may want to trade up to get him but that is a very costly move these days or they could sit at 8 and really overpay for the much older Weeden.
Of course what all this really means is that if your head is still hurting from all the side-to-side shaking you have endured over the last week, it’s likely going to get a lot worse when Jeff Ireland is reportedly going to send one, two, maybe three picks to the Broncos for…yep, you guessed it Tim Tebow. Thus Tebowmania will arrive in South Florida.
There will be several fans of this move, most notably the fans who came to see the Florida Gator championship team last year at the Dolphins vs. Broncos game, you know the ones who really are not Dolphins fans, and the others will be the rest of the 31 NFL teams who fall out of their seat laughing. The rest of the fan base will cry in their beers and start warming up to the idea of rooting for, oh I don’t know, the Jaguars?
You can write it down, the Dolphins need to sell tickets and they need to make a splash to re-energize the fan base. The problem is that Stephen Ross and Jeff Ireland will likely believe that Tim Tebow is an answer for that problem. There will be rumors starting very soon and the sooner that Manning inks his deal, the sooner those rumors will pick up steam. The reality is, Tebow will play somewhere next year and it looks more and more like Miami is the destination if for no other reason than that is exactly how this off-season has gone. (I recommend Tebowing right now to convince God that he belongs elsewhere).
So there you have it in an off colored article about dating chicks and jilted lovers…no intent on saying that Flynn is really a prom queen and not knocking him one bit. So please, just read into it what you will and prepare to embrace the craziness that will ensue if Tim Tebow becomes a Dolphin.
Oh and to the website that I poked fun at for mentioning a month ago that Tim Tebow would be a Miami Dolphin…I’m really sorry…in so many ways you have no idea.